PARIS, March 9 — With the proliferation of podcasts or books focusing on personal development, and the influence of carefully crafted lifestyles on social networks, more and more singles are considering shunning, or at least questioning, the relentless pursuit of perfection. In fact, this quest can lead to a form of mental exhaustion known as “betterment burnout.”

What if we stopped chasing perfection? By constantly striving to improve, the opposite effect can occur. People can become desperate and end up experiencing a form of psychological fatigue known as “betterment burnout.” This weariness is often seen in single people, around half of whom (51 per cent) feel obliged to constantly strive to improve in order to find love, according to a Bumble* study released earlier this year.

For Dr Caroline West, sex and relationship expert at Bumble, “betterment burnout” is not unrelated to the lockdowns and restrictions imposed by the Covid-19 pandemic: “Even now, many of us are still experiencing post-lockdown fatigue from the relentless pressure to acquire new skills, monetize side hustles, and manage numerous responsibilities, whilst ‘achieving.’”

She continues: “When paired with constant comparison on social media, ‘betterment burnout’ results. Curated online personalities from peers and celebrities contribute to a personal sense of inadequacy, leading to the relentless pursuit of our perfect selves.”

To avoid this mental exhaustion, singles surveyed by Bumble** have decided to swap the pursuit of perfection for that of happiness. A quarter of singles worldwide have decided to focus on happiness rather than self-improvement, particularly Gen Z singles and young Millennials (32 per cent under 35). Across Europe, nearly two-thirds of women now want to make decisions for their own happiness, detaching themselves from the norms and expectations imposed by society. Another 40 per cent are looking for partners who accept them as they are, without trying to change them.

Indeed, single people are now turning to self-prioritization, putting their self-esteem before the love of another. So it’s not surprising to see that dating trends where the emphasis is on the quality rather than the quantity of encounters are flourishing in the dating world. — ETX Studio

*The study was conducted by Censuswide among 3,021 nationally representative consumers aged over 18 in the UK, France, Spain, Italy and Germany between December 18, 2023 and December 20, 2023.

**The study was conducted by Bumble using an internal survey between September 21 and 26, 2023 among a sample of 26,849 Bumble members worldwide.